Hiya guys! And just when I thought I was caught-up on my posts I ended up in a super depression funk for the last week or so. To make matters worse - because when it rains and it pours - I woke up with the complete flu this weekend. I know I should be resting, but at the same time I didn't want to wait too much longer for this post because it's the Book of The Month! And this month we are going to be diving into a different kind of book. We are going to be taking a look into the book #feels by Kalyn Nicholson, who is also one of my favorite YouTubers as well. It's no secret that I've been struggling or maybe it is a secret because I don't share as much as I think I do. This was even before this super hard week even took place. I'm so locked up in the darkest corners of my mind that I forget to reach out sometimes. Or even when I do speak to someone I never fully open up. It's one of those things that even when you recognize the problem it's not easy to fix. Since this is the month of love and all that, I figured giving myself a heavy dose of self-love and care was much appropriate. And very much needed after spending 3-4 days straight crying.
As much as I would love to pick up a fantasy book (or start a new Netflix show) and just completely lose myself in it I know it's not what I need right now. And at the same time I don't find myself wanting to straight up read a self-help book. YouTuber books are notorious for being not the best reads out there, but every once in a while I can't help drifting into this 'genre' per say. Especially if it's a book from someone I'm subscribed to and enjoy watching their videos. It almost feels like having a friend on friend talk sans judgement. And that's exactly what I find myself needing in this moment in time. This book is just a part of a bigger over haul on my self care. I don't want you guys to worry or think all I'm doing is reading a book, haha. But in order to get to that place where I can care for myself again I need to relate and find that 'silent friend' that is just a page away.
#feels reads as a pep-talk based on what we are feeling. We open the index, pick the words that best describe our mood, and go to the page. That simple. And suddenly we have Kalyn there to let us know that we aren't alone and that we can get through whatever it is we having going on. The idea of the book is very simple as it's core. And yet it feels so effective and much needed as someone who is currently struggling. It's like a voice in our head guiding us on a path that doesn't feel probable in the moment. It's a light read for a heavy heart and it feels perfect amongst the chaos.
It's also literally a light read/book and fits perfectly in my bag to take with me on the go. I love the concept of being able to flip through the book at a moments notice. It takes a lot of pressure over finding the perfect time to sit down and read. Something that I struggle with quite a bit.
Sigh. Speaking of struggle... It sounds a little silly to say much less write out, but feeling all these feelings is hard. And draining. I don't know what's worse: feeling whatever it is or fighting myself from feeling it. It's like a constant tug of war between my emotions with my brains eating popcorn on the side watching the fight go down. I feel like I need to stop and just let myself feel whatever it is I'm feeling for as long as it happens. Like I said though, hard stuff. Especially when it's not always the happy things. And with me it's almost always never the happy things.
Bottom line... Being a human is hard and next life time I want to be reincarnated as a rock.
I feel like this post got a little off topic from the whole book of the month thing. I hope that's okay and that I'm not a total drag to read with, haha. This book is definitely not everyones cup of tea and that's perfectly fine! But I do hope that some of you guys will join in me diving into this light read. And just maybe we can feel a little less alone together. Catch you next time xoxo Moonbaes.
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